03 May 2012

The Writer's Voice Entry

Hey folks! Today I'm participating in the Writer's Voice competition hosted by a slew of awesome people including my beloved Cupid. So, for your viewing pleasure, here's my query and first 250 from Duality.


Query for Duality - Adult Science Fiction

If Dima could remember her life, she's damn sure she'd want it back.

The Humani Project's latest test subject believes she's human, but her sleek black fur, claws, and tail make that seem impossible. Her only clue to an existence before panther DNA was spliced to hers is a name-Janelle.

According to the scientists, Dima is the perfect blend of human and animal. Most importantly, she can still speak, making her the lab's most successful Humani to date. But that doesn't guarantee her safety.

Imprisoned in a Phoenix, Arizona lab, Dima must complete the grueling, and often deadly, physical assessments administered by resident jackass Dr. Frederick James. Voice or no voice, her failure means immediate termination. To survive, she must tame the wild animal that wants to take over-only she has no idea how.

When she fails a combat assessment and is nearly killed by her opponent, she's surprised that the project's founder, Lorenzo, breaks protocol to save her. When he calls her "Janelle," she realizes that the scientists have erased someone they knew. She's determined to understand why.

Surrounded by lies and half-truths, Dima doesn't know who to trust or believe. The closer she comes to piecing together her story, the harder she has to fight to stay alive. Worse yet, she's falling for Lorenzo, the man who made her a monster. Why does the one person she should hate the most care for her? Why does she feel the same?

Good thing cats have nine lives-she'll need every one of them to uncover the truth.


First 250 Words:

Claws popped from my fingertips every time I stretched my hands.

It tingled, but didn’t hurt, not like the rest of my body. The sensation was both natural and foreign, muscles and tendons I didn’t know I had contracting and relaxing with the movement. I’d freaked out when I saw the black fur leading to the claws. That was the second time they’d upped my morphine. The first time was after my tongue had brushed against fang.

The steady, faithful morphine drip, now on its highest setting according to the a gray-haired nurse—the only one who would speak to me—barely dented the pain ransacking every nerve, muscle, and bone. Waves of agony rolled from my feet to my head and crashed against everything in between. But somehow it kept my mind safe, stable. Human. Didn’t matter much. Too little information left me with questions no one would answer.

The brunette, a waif in a too-large white coat, had mentioned cardiac arrest. She’d said a lot of other things, too, most of which I ignored. She kept calling me a name I didn’t recognize but thought I knew from somewhere. I couldn’t ask about it, though. The “stress of the procedure” had frozen my vocal cords; however, she spoke like she didn’t expect me to have a voice at all.

They should have just let me die. No doubt it would have hurt a helluva lot less.

Today was Day Four, if I’d counted correctly.

36 comments:

Nicole Zoltack said...

Congrats on getting in! Good luck!

Adam Oster said...

Good Luck!

lexcade said...

Thanks, guys! <3

Matthew MacNish said...

Congrats on making it in Lexcade! I've never seen a linky list fill up that fast. :)

Sarah Ahiers said...

woo hoo! Congrats!
Also, this sounds badass

lexcade said...

Thanks, Matt! You're such a sweetheart <3. The list thing was UNREAL. Holy cow. I can only imagine how crazy the 2nd window will be.

Sarah, thanks, doll! I really liked yours too. Best of luck!

Laurie said...

Good luck!

Megan said...

So glad you made it in! Love your first 250, awesome concept!!

Eliza Tilton said...

yay! Looks good!Go get em.

Cait Peterson said...

Good luck, Cate! Good to be up against this one again ;)

Becca C. said...

Sweet concept! Good luck!

T.L. Bodine said...

Thanks for the comment on my blog. This looks great! Good luck :D

Sarah said...

I think this sounds really cool. The writing is great! Good luck!

-Sarah #146

Xan said...

Reminds me a little of Dark Angel - you've definitely got my attention. Good luck!

Noelle Pierce said...

Wow, this sounds awesome! I don't usually read sci-fi, but what I like is that this isn't a paranormal/shifter, but a science experiment. I love the voice, too. Good luck!

Jaye Robin Brown said...

So cool. Sounds great.

Ryan said...

Holy Cow Lex,
I'm never going to look at you the same way again on QT. This is AWE. SOME. Great premise, great writing. I HAVE TO READ YOUR BOOK! So you better hurry up and get it published. So So So good. (And I'm not just saying that.) Too bad I'm not an agent, I would totally represent you.
-Tele
#122

lexcade said...

You guys rock my socks. Seriously. I'm making my way through the entries.

Xan, Dark Angel was one of my favorite shows. I LOOOOVED it. So the comparison makes me all giddy ^_^

Noelle, THANK YOU. I think that's one of its strongest points.

Ryan, Bwahahahahahaha. Thank you for the compliments. They mean quite a bit!

Krysten Hill said...

Finally got back to you!

Oh my, I've always wanted to do something sort of like this! (Not exactly, but you know what I mean) but you beat me to it! Damn!

Oh well, it seems interesting. My characters have black fur!--tails that is ;)

Best of luck!

-Cara #41

C.G.Ayling said...

Fascinating stuff, and nicely done. Just the kind of SF I would read. Hope you get it published!

Good luck!

Brenda McKenna said...

Wow! This is SF with character and cats, which makes it something I want to read very, very badly.

RaeChell Garrett said...

I already told you I love the voice, but I figured I'd tell you again since I'm making my QT rounds. Good luck, lady.

rpg123/raefo123

April Wall said...

Stopping by to say good luck, one contestant to another! Interesting premise for sure.

Danielle La Paglia said...

Good luck!

T. Drecker said...

Can't I keep reading? I've always loved stories like this.
Good luck!

Marieke said...

Awesome! Very intrigued by this :D Good luck!

Carrie Butler said...

Oo, intriguing! :) Good luck!

TYHatch said...

A scary idea! I was hooked quickly.

Good luck!

Tina (#194)

Huntress said...

oh, Yes, Yes, yesyesyes, I would read more of this!
Yowza! Great job.

Cherie Larkins said...

Love the concept! The animal-human splicing part kinda reminded me of The Island of Dr. Moreau. Good luck!!

Amalia T. said...

I love the last line of your query! Good luck!

A. K. Fotinos-Hoyer said...

I am totally in love with your premise - I remember being so excited for that animal splicing movie that came out a awhile ago, and then disappointed. I'd love a really good splicing story that delivers!

And awesome query, btw :)

Best of luck!

Carolyn Abiad said...

Best of luck!
Carolyn, #157

lexcade said...

Y'all are so sweet :)

AK, are you talking about Splice??? Cuz I kept thinking "I could use that as a similarity thing, like 'The Island of Dr Moreau meets Splice' or whatever. I actually liked that movie...until the creepy end part. That scarred me for life.

Cherie, The Island of Dr. Moreau is one of my favorite books. I love me some HG Wells!

Mia K Rose said...

Stopping by to wish you good luck. :) Sounds like an interesting read.

I agree, Splice was ok, until the end and became well yeah... -_-

valerierlawson said...

great concept and loved your first page. good luck in the contest.

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